I should probably look past this flummoxing discovery and actually say something about the game. Any moment now they're going to break into a dance that's supposed to teach me the value of sharing. I'm watching a playthrough, and the Teensies sound like insufferable pricks from a knock-off TV puppet show. Lord knows how many times I played through it, back when a game had to last me months on end. A layer of ghastly intelligibility pasted over a world I'm still intimately familiar with after a decade and a half. I thought that heresy didn't appear until Rayman 3, but nope, here it is. I just found out the PlayStation version gave everyone English voices. All of them, though, would mutter away in subtitled gibberish I deemed integral to their alienness. Anyone could be around the next corner, from a friendly sea monster who'd let you water-ski on them to a terrifying robo-pirate (I was only little). I'll always remember Rayman 2: The Great Escape as a deeply strange alien world. One a day, every day, perhaps for all time. Have You Played? is an endless stream of game retrospectives.
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